Sunday, July 5, 2015

Artistic Grief

Hey Art fans,

I hope this finds all of you happy and healthy. I hope your summer days are filled with colors and light.

I am having a hard time creating at the moment and I am not sure what, if anything I can do about it, except live through it. Grief has a hold of me in a new way and I am struggling a bit.

June 28th is always, ALWAYS a hard day for me. It is the day my Pops passed. I miss his wisdom, his laughter, his winking eyes and his hugs. I miss his unconditional love and support and even his swift kicks to my backside when I needed it.

This year, my grief doubled.

My sweet friend of 19 years passed away at 11:59 pm on June 28th. It was not an unexpected death, but it has hit me really hard. I was able to say goodbye and hang out with some of her good friends as we held a living memorial to her gathered around her bed.

It has been a hard week. I am not sure when the lights inside me will be flipped back on so I can create again. I just seem to need some time and a little space to just be and not have expectations of myself. Grief is funny that way for me, it lingers around for a little while and then suddenly it loosens the grip from my heart and all the bottled up creations come pouring out.

The week before her passing, I was in Santa Barbara for a educational training and was able to spend time with the most lovely of people. There was no radio or TV to distract me, only long walks and conversation as I connected.

Maybe that is why I am being hit so hard right now, coming off an intense but really good week of deep connections to a loss and the world's static. I don't know.

Please just keep checking back in the next few weeks. I promise I will post something soon.

Peace, Love and well being until the next hello,